You finally hit rock bottom and decide you want to do something about your life. To lose weight, get active, wear clothes you don’t need to order online. To grab your life with both hands and shake it until your happiness falls out of its pockets.

But then somebody told you about “fat shaming” and the new “body positive” movement. The YouTube videos and fat activist websites tell you that not only is it okay to be fat, but that it’s actually fabulous, and something you should be proud of. Something to be celebrated.

WTF? There’s nothing positive about being overweight.

Stand up and go stand in front of the biggest mirror you have.

Do you feel like celebrating? Do you feel fabulous?

I doubt it.

Being overweight is painful and uncomfortable, so celebrating it doesn’t make any sense. Your back hurts, your knees ache, and you just generally feel really shit. When was the last time you woke up as an overweight person and felt good about yourself, energetic, and looking forward to facing your day? There haven’t been any, right?

But you’ve seen the videos of that fat chick dancing around on TV, right? She’s body positive and fat fabulous, right? Yeah she is until she drops dead 20 -30 years before she biologically should.

You know that your body is genetically wired to live to the age of 120, right? That’s the relative maximum lifespan for a human being. Imagine living 120 years. How cool would that be?

But when you’re stupidly overweight you’re not going to live to 120. Hell, you’ll be lucky to reach 60, and that’s only after 20+ years of diabetes, chronic joint pain, exhaustion, sleep apnea, and just generally hating yourself.

Let me ask you another question: How many morbidly obese people do you see living into their 70s, 80s or 90s? How many severely overweight elderly people do you personally know? A handful? Probably fewer than 5. Do they look healthy, happy and vibrant, or do they look like a pile of hot garbage that’s just waiting around to die?

So that fat chick can jump, dance and pirouette to her heart’s content, but she’s not going to do it for more than a few years before her joints collapse under the pressure, and she spends the rest of her life in a wheelchair. Then she’ll die, and nobody will give a shit about or remember the fact that she was the fat chick that used to dance. That she was body positive. Instead they’ll have to remove her body using a crane, maybe taking out the windows of her house to actually remove her corpse. I’ve seen that done. It’s not pretty.

It’s worse than just that one body positive idiot though. You also have the body positive, plus-sized models. Morbidly obese women parading around in lingerie, with people applauding their bravery.

Being so fat you get out of breath standing up is brave?

Bravery is fighting cancer alone while raising a family. It’s storming the beaches at Normandy knowing there’s a good chance you’ll die. Bravery is rushing into a burning building and rescuing a family of puppies or kittens trapped inside. There is, however, absolutely nothing brave about eating so much food, for so long, that you can’t fit into a regular bus or plane seat without using an extender. But these body positive models don’t see a problem with that, and as a matter of fact it’s actually everyone else’s problem for not understanding that. It’s society. It’s the airline industry picking on them. It’s sexist men. But it is NEVER, EVER their fault for getting so fat they have to buy two seats to enjoy any level of comfort while traveling. They’re professionals at making excuses for their own failings…just like you.

Continue reading – But..healthy food is so expensive!